The Magic Dream Machine
Is the Self an Illusion Promulgated by a Snake Oil School of Pop Psychology?
Ultimate Purposes Who are you? Who am I? What is the fundamental, not to be taken lightly, ultimate purpose of life? More importantly, what is the fundamental, not to be taken lightly, ultimate purpose of My life? I was ten years old when I began my existential, self-obsessed quest for a personal mission plan. I was that tall, skinny kid standing in the back yard out of ear shot of the neighbors and my overly inquisitive mother, asking God to give me a hint. "Why was I here? What was I supposed to do or be? I really expected the Almighty or at least a guardian angel to present me with a worthy purpose or minimal rationale for my existence. At fifteen, I was still clueless, but I knew I wanted to do something really special and attract the attention and admiration of generations to come. At thirty I decided the goal of life was knowledge and rejected the notion of a hedonistic or a pleasure oriented existence. Currently, my major obsession is to be creative and a good person. Somewhere along the line, I let go of most of my worldly ambitions and started focusing on spiritual and internal growth. Though I would still like to change the world and win a few million dollars, I've poured much of my soul into writing stories and essays few are likely to read. Like most existentially challenged types, I am self-fixated and more than a little self-obsessed. Nevertheless, I think it is natural and quite necessary for people to alter their life purposes and objectives as they mature. I suspect most of us need a little identity reconstruction from time to time. However, in a society captivated by images of the child self, adolescent self, self image and self esteem, my sneaky suspicion that the Self is a convenient fiction promulgated by a snake oil school of pop psychology scares the hell out of me. |
Self and the Body My concern regarding the reality or existence of my Self can be illustrated by a Zen exercise. First there is my body. Being humanoid, it has two legs, two arms, one head, ten toes, ten fingers, two eyes, two ears, one mouth, a place for sitting, and a place for digesting food and another for eliminating the leftovers. I can identify its gender__female, race__ Caucasian and the condition of its musculature__flabby! I possess an individualistic perspective on this body; in as much as no one else can occupy this exact, material space except me. (I am discounting the dualistic experience of pregnancy, since fetuses don't quite qualify as independent entities prior to birth.) However, "Am I really my body? " What makes me aware of this body? Who is observing, witnessing and making nasty remarks about it's condition? Since this body is the object of my scrutiny, the person that thinks it is my Self appears to be quite distinct from this body. . However, such insights or suppositions don't tell me who or what I am! Some people believe the nature of the Self can be discovered or investigated through its emotions. Each feeling has its own signature, physical quality and result. Consider the most elemental feeling, fear. When we are frightened, our body gears up to run and hide or to fight. The adrenal glands pour adrenaline into the system, the extremities occasionally shake, the mouth becomes dry, and the heart may palpitate. Like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming car I might freeze. Conversely, I could tighten my muscles, push my head forward, bare my teeth, pick up some stones and prepare to do battle. |
Senses & Names Human beings experience multiple feelings as they move through the emotional and intellectual sensorium. We might name these feelings and identify our Self as sad, happy, depressed, exasperated, nervous and so on. However, the maximum duration of any specific emotional effect on a persons physiology is four minutes. After four minutes our moods, feelings and emotions cease to have an effect on the body and the brain. A person might continue to describe herself as angry or frightened but that is the result of an intellectual judgement, not an expression of feeling. I conclude from this, that one may have a feeling, but self and feeling are not identical.
Once upon a Zen story, a student complained about his uncontrollable temper to his master. The guru said he would be happy to help the student, but first he had to understand the nature of this uncontrollable temper. "Please tell me how much this uncontrollable temper weighs?" |
Imagination However, imagination, a major component of the Magic Dream Machine , is value neutral. If you imagine the stranger is an enemy who plans to hurt you or has damaged you in some way, you will probably feel hostile, suspicious and unloving. The peculiar nature of imagination encourages us to move beyond the barrier of Self and individual differences. It paints a picture of the world beyond us, of how people are and what they are likely to do. It even has the power to affect the actions and reactions of others. Take for example, that person who imagined the stranger to be an enemy and consequently felt hostile and suspicious when they came into contact. It should come as no surprise that the stranger will respond in a similar fashion and will eventually become a real enemy rather than an imaginary one. If a neutral person (if neutrality is possible) entered the scene and asked these avowed enemies to explain just why and how they came to dislike each other, each of them will come up with a perfectly plausible excuse for their enmity. They will be able to recall in shocking detail everything the other did to merit the label of enemy. Each will recall numerous instances of wrong doing by the other, but strangely enough, neither will remember how they contributed to this state of affairs. This brings me to my second point regarding imagination, namely, its profound effect on memory. |
Imagination & Memory I was about nine years old when I became obsessed with the concept of memory. Why do we recall certain events in minute detail and forget others? On this particular midsummer day, I felt unusually happy and aware. Even the most commonplace sight and sound seemed full of significance and I felt something momentous was about to happen. My bare feet dug deeply into the soft dirt of the recently graded street and a breeze tickled the back of my neck. House finches were flying in and out of honeysuckle vines and Hibiscus bushes by the side of the road. Fluffy cumulus clouds filled the sky and a bright yellow butterfly was clinging to a tuft of grass near my knee. Even though I was entranced by the natural splendor of the day, a dark thought clouded my vision. I realized that time was passing and someday I wouldn't remember this perfect moment at all. This insight into the transient nature of personal experience encouraged me to speculate on the whole phenomenon of memory. What makes certain events stand out in our minds and why do others vanish as soon as they occur? Above all, I wanted to know how to remember this moment of beauty and wonder, exactly as it happened. I thought if I concentrated very hard I might be able to capture the moment. I decided to focus on every sensation, every sound and every sight around me. Then I noticed a fundamental change in my consciousness. Every time I focused on the internal process of memory, the external world disappeared, but when I paid attention to what my senses were telling me, my internal world, my feelings and thoughts also vanished. I learned that the world of the mind and the world of tangible events are very different, and seem to operate according to different criteria. While external reality is quite solid, easily manipulated, and relatively consistent; my internal reality appears to be nothing more than a domain of ideas, floating on a sea of feelings, held together by a strong sense of Self. In some mysterious fashion, ideas, pictures, feelings, memories and answers emerge from this uncharted realm. All I need to do is ask a question and an appropriate response floats to the surface. At least it seems appropriate, I haven't the slightest idea why one answer seems better or more accurate than another. |
Consciousness & Independence It operates like a lighthouse, beaming its light across the darkened sea of experience and thought, briefly touching bits and pieces of emotional flotsam, lingering on a semi-submerged island or rocky salience. It can illuminate everything except its own source and leaves it up to its partner, imagination, to suggest what lies under the sea or inside the lighthouse. Oddly enough, consciousness, in its highest form, functions well when trained on a feeling, a thought, an attitude, or a belief even though such internal phenomena is invisible and not quantifiable by hard science. Consciousness also seems to be highly independent, and individualistic. I suspect no matter how much you resemble someone, it insists on a basic distinction between you and the other. Consciousness rejects the notion that a little girl is just like her mother or that people in the same socio/economic class are all the same. Is our awareness of Self responsible for egocentricity, self-absorption and the myth of individuality? I'm not sure, but I do know that individual awareness or consciousness bestows the gift of detachment and can expand the boundaries of the mind. However, as important as consciousness is, it can only make us aware of our illusions, give us insight into our unique realities and alert us to possible problems. Being conscious of something is unlikely to generate solutions or ideas unless it is working with its partners, imagination and will. |
Imagination, Will & Consciousness Some question exists regarding whether will, free or otherwise, is any more than the result of a persons instincts, social experience and environment. Perhaps it is nothing more than convenient myth useful to those who believe a person is responsible for her choices and decisions. The premise of an individual having control over her goals and behaviors (except in the case of a deranged adult or incompetent youth) is essential for lawgivers and the administration of justice. Certain philosophers, David Hume for example, discount the importance of rational influences upon the will; believing it to be governed by passion or emotional preferences. If the former is the case and human beings are capable of selecting goals, acting on principle, and controlling their behavior, then justice is founded in the notion that reason can govern will. In other words, no matter how much Johnny wants to kick his nagging wife and whining children, he can choose to apply his will and resist the impulse once he considers the probable consequences of a violent action. However, if Johnny's will is determined by his passions, than the notion of will, particularly free will, may be nothing more than an euphemism for instinctive desires and cravings. However, irrespective of the nature or the existence of free will, any theory regarding the origin, functioning and purpose of any aspect of the mind begins with imagination. Johnny's imagination enables the process of speculating on possibilities and envisioning alternatives to ordinary reality. It can also help him consider the consequences of his actions. If Johnny gives into the barbaric impulse to kick his wife and damage his child, his imagination could present him with a number of consequences. His wife and child could cease their irritating behavior and defer to his position as head of the house. They might acknowledge their complicity in arousing his ire and accept his innate masculine superiority. Of course, one or both of them could also run away from home, call the police, hire a hit man, or poison his morning tea. |
Metaphor & Hypothesis Imagination's chief occupation is the production of metaphors and hypotheses. A metaphor is a pictorial as if concept, which postulates something concrete as resembling or symbolizing something in the internal world. Metaphors pull things together and sharpen the picture we have of an event, a person or an intangible reality. Earlier, I mentioned a woman who thought the mind operated like a camera, in this case, camera is a metaphor for a mental process. On the other hand, a hypothesis, is an If then statement which can be tested. For example, if Johnny kicked his wife then the police might be called in. Or if he kicks me again and I call the police, then what? Hypotheses are essential when we consider the probable consequences of an action or procedure. Scientists would find it impossible to investigate the nature of reality without hypotheses. For example, If the earth is round, then we can sail our boat around it or " if we split the atom, then vast amounts of energy will be released. Scientists know better than to ignore or down play the role of imagination. Virtually every advance in the world of science and technology started with a hypothesis drawn out of its mysterious domain. However, scientists are also aware that imagination is just as likely to produce a flawed hypothesis, or send researchers on wild goose chases. No matter how vivid, appealing or desirable a hypothesis may be, it has to be tested before its validity or usefulness can be accepted. Perhaps the real difference between the disciplined mindset of a science major and the creative mindscape of an artist, writer, or filmmaker, is their use of imaginative processes. However, I believe the metaphors, hypotheses, theories and narratives drawn out of our imaginations have as much effect on our lives as more tangible experiences and because of this, people are quite capable of rewriting the past, and re-creating our own lives. |
The Magic Dream Machine 2
Saving Your Soul